Thursday, February 4, 2010

college essay

I pull up to the water-box and sit in complete silence as I concatenate and focus on what is about to happen. I get the call to pull up to the staging tree, do a quick burn out to clean off my tires and the smell of burnt rubber becomes my new air-freshener. Then I pull up to the stage lights and see who I’m racing, it happens be a young kid in one of parent’s Camero SS. The car was really nice and I knew that it was fast because I could hear the lope from the upgraded cam shaft in the motor. I don’t mind racing people using there parents cars, but I knew he was faster. That didn’t bother me because I know that I have worked on my own car. A person who is a real car guy has a number of distinctive qualities. I have them all: my hands are always dirty; I don’t think that I have a clean pair of jeans, and I think that some people think that my cologne is high octane gas.
Ever since I can remember my dad has fixed his own vehicles; so whenever I could I would help him on his projects, he had showed me that you did not have to take your car into a shop if you could do the work yourself. I remember the first day that he showed me how to change the oil in his car. I took off the drain plug and got oil everywhere so; he corrected me and showed me the proper way to do things. When my dad showed me how to do some work it inspired me to learn more about them. My dad said it was good to do your own work. Now I realized what he meant when he said that. I also looked at others cars and that inspired me to be an automotive technician because I wanted my car to be nice like theirs. I have done all the work to my car and am proud of it to. Also I am proud that I have done all the work my self. He has been the biggest inspiration and push to pursuit my career as an automotive technician.
Since I worked on cars with my father as a young boy I have wanted to be an automotive technician. For example when my friends have a problem with one of their cars they come to me and ask me for advice or some help. For instance, my friend’s car was knocking really bad one day and he came to me for some help. I heard the knock and knew right away where it was coming from. I told him to open up the hood and the sound got louder and it just verified what I was thinking, it was a rocker arm that was making the noise. I had told him that is was most likely from lack of lubrication in the cylinder head. We checked his oil and it was really low, that was why it was knocking I told him. We topped it off and it stopped knocking. He was glad that I had saved his engine and some money. Now if something is going on with his car he comes to me for a first opinion.
Since I know that I will be going to Universal Technical Institute in Rancho Cucamonga, California I know that it will cost about 36,000 dollars for my technician certification and all my schooling. My parents have always been hard workers, and they have given me what I have and I am grateful and I appreciate that, but times are tough and they can’t afford to put me through school. That’s why I am looking for some funding to supercharge my life and finish that important race to finish college. Finishing college would be just like finishing my race. The adrenalin rush you get when you’re running your car to the limit at the end of the track. The sound of the engine winding down as you let off the gas to turn and pick up your time slip. Then the feeling of accomplishment as you reach with your trembling hand out the window and pick up your time slip; when you see how much you have improved your time. That’s the same feeling that I want to experience in a few years after I finish college and look back at my life.

1 comment:

  1. THis essay was much better than the first ones I had read. You has some grammatical and punctuation mistakes. I revised this paper too and put it in the Classroom 2 folder, expository writing, student essays, #2 folder. I think you will like the way the essay is organized. I hope the comments help. As far as the rubric goes here's what I thought you did at the 6 level:Writing is strongly focused
    shows fresh insight into the task
    consistently targets an audience through word choices and supporting details
    Successfully presents information in a fluent, organized manner
    Provides convincing,
    support for ideas
    Grade: 83/100 from 65!!

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